#so obviously what connects me with most of you here are games. maybe got and lotr as no-games thing

[queersolaris]

I watched Flow (2024) a few days ago and I have been itching to get my thoughts out in some kind of way!! So don’t mind me gushing/ psychoanalysis this absolutely amazing movie—

This post will probably be all over the place cause I am still processing everything; forgive the jumbling thoughts

I think this movie had so many angles to see it from~ I totally got the found family (MY BRAND) and climate change perspectives buuuut what got me tearing up was interpreting it as parts of a person processing trauma

“oh this feels like it should be a video game” was actually my first thought

From the silence, style, hell even the boat steering felt like a game mechanic-- it kept coming to mind that this was similar to games like Brothers: a tale of two sons or When the past was around (kinda)?

It seemed obvious that there is trauma going on; how could there not be with an event like that? The theme that got me thinking it was more so about parts was 'reflection'

Obviously it starts and ends with a scene of the cat looking at itself in the water; but there was also our lemur friend being obsessed with their reflection in the mirror. From the angle of it being about parts dealing with trauma here is my dump of thoughts— I know its not that deep but I JUST GOTTA GET THIS OUTTA ME

The stags running represents the trauma event itself and the water felt like the overwhelming feelings that come afterwards-- something you can’t control it’s depth and suffocated by as it keeps rising no matter how much you try to escape/ignore it

The cat being in a house that is already run down feels like it’s clinging onto anything that is familiar but the feelings won’t let the cat survive— feelings will create the need for change and that’s is unavoidable (especially with trauma) The run down house could also have represented the way the cat has settled in poor conditions with time, old memories from a simpler time, and that can lead to isolation

Cat = representing resilience/self sustainability through situations which is why it is the main POV; it can lead to overwhelm and helplessness when isolated but it is the adaptability that is needed to progress (throughout the movie or trauma)-- the statues at the house could also be seen as almost versions of that; moments that it was bigger, smaller, more mobile but always is the same form

Dog = it was interesting that this character was introduced at the start but not along the journey the whole time right? I thought they were a representation of surviving through socializing— there is childishness and innocence but it is mainly always seen with others or serving others

Maybe the dog even could represent a child self ; something always willing to trusts others and help selflessly They do jump in to protect but in a way that is not rejecting

Capybara = survival by freezing or floating thru the situation— which is why we get to see them already on the boat, their focus is to nurture itself for the next day… taking it one day at a time and doing what it could but not worrying too much about the things it can’t help

Bird = the opposite of our doggy friend— we meet it as the one of the first to be around others of its kind but there is a self sacrificing nature to it. Giving its food to fighting for the cats safety... it has a protective role; however in a way that reject risks of the groups survival/comfort (with the pack of dogs) yet when that over protectiveness leaves… the situation ends soon after

I wondered before the bird disappeared if it was meant to be a older self— still juxtaposed to the dog— something with more trust issues because of experience, it looks after the other parts, even steers the others in the right direction... the connection to the cat also felt right ya know?? The parts of you that are willing to adapt usually come out the most in adulthood or when you need to be your more 'mature' self

There is also the concept of the flight response it could represent; which is why they did not want to be around the pack of dogs— almost showing it wanting to run/keep away from others

It disappearing felt like maybe there was something else— like this is meant to represent passing on a part or habit that kept healing at bay but was necessary to move through the trauma

Lemur = obsessed with material and it’s own reflection— it seems to be the part that tries to survive with status and the approval of others; of course being self destructive…

Maybe representing rumination, clinging onto things that are apart of the familiarity (which is why the movie kept the ball from the house as a reoccurring object), and even masking since the mirror was something that gave it company later before realizing it wasn’t the kind of company it wanted

The foundations crumble suddenly, the overflow of emotions (water) starts to sink in; leaving things different and the same (it seems like the same forest/area). We see the stags again running like before-- which almost indicates that something similar could happen. Then the cat waits for it all to happen again; the worst. When nothing does it runs after them almost looking for an answer, I think we've all been there; trying to figure out why our responses vary or what is was about us that has changed from before that makes things easier. That's when the cat gets to see our final part:

Whale = this thing made me cry for sure because throughout the story it felt like this represented old coping mechanisms (like from childhood); something that kept you a float or going no matter how dire things became—when rock bottom would hit in the middle of floating/navigating so many feelings-- it ensured survival. Even when the cat finally learned to fish for itself (which now i wonder was meant to be like naming emotions or processing things bit by bit) the whale shows up once more almost to be a reminder that it was still around even when not fully needed. At the end when foundations crumbled, the whale is no longer able to survive… and the cat is able to thank it for its help.

The water was there the whole movie but there was little times when the cat seemed to look at it's reflection. When it did it again at the end of the movie but with whole group being together-- I was obviously crying because dammit undertale you’re right despite everything it is still you

OH about the video game thought— looking at this from the lens of a trauma response; it did make more sense to be told as a movie; I mean with a game I can pause… I can take myself out of their experience and feel in control with a situation that is meant to not let us feel any

So being a movie instead is actually perfect

[yuurei20]

I heard from someone that Azul is actually very strong although he's not very athletic because he's an octo merman he's mostly muscle they said that Floyd has talked about it in bean fest I wanted to know if Azul being insanely strong was just a headcannon or cannon cause its kinda funny to me azul could carry professor vargas that one event on his own when prof vargas is pure muscle

Hello hello! Thank you for this question! 🐙

Yes yes! The first information we receive about Azul being stronger than he looks is from Floyd during Beanfest, who explains,

"Who said anything about Azul bein' weak without his magic? He's real strong. He's slow on land and in water, and he's got lousy athletic reflexes, but that doesn't mean he's weak."

"Azul's bigger than me in the water, and he's got eight huge, heavy limbs. His submission holds are bad news, and he's got crazy grip strength. If he so much as snags you, he can snare you with your arms pinned.

Octopi are, like, all muscle. Seems to me like that wouldn't go poof just 'cause he took a potion to turn himself human.

I'm just spitballin' here, obviously. But all I'm saying is that writing Azul off is a bad idea."

(All of the above dialogue is 100% accurate to the original game! Floyd's "I'm just spitballin' here" line might make it seems like he is just guessing and doesn't actually know, but his original line is closer to, "I don't know all the details," and sounds more like he knows this information is fact, he just can't give a physiology lesson on how it all works.)

But Floyd's information is a little vague: he says Azul has "crazy grip strength" and his "submission holds are bad news," but that is the same line where he talks about Azul in his merform--so is he talking about mer-Azul or human-Azul? Or is he not making a distinction because there isn't one?

Can Azul snare people and pin them down on land, or was Floyd half-relating an anecdote from when they lived underwater?

But then came Book 6 and a line from Azul himself saying that his "arms are quite powerful," unlike Riddle's.

This seems to confirm that Azul is physically stronger than most people, but then comes the thunder spear:

Riddle asks for help lifting it and Azul struggles under its weight, despite how this would have been the ideal opportunity to illustrate how physically capable Azul really is.

But maybe the thunder spears are a tall order for anyone to lift? They're weapons from the age of the gods--maybe they just weren't designed for humans (or creatures in human form) to lift on their own?

Except:

There is Leona, who both lifts and wields the thunder spear entirely on his own, twice (he gets help from Jamil the third time).

But the rules of the thunder spears are unclear: after Team-OctaHearts' spear goes into energy-saving mode Riddle says, "I should be able to handle it now on my own," insinuating that when they are not in attack-mode they are easier to wield.

Azul carries it at first but, due to his infamously poor stamina, he does eventually give it up to Riddle.

When Azul comments on how easy RIddle makes carrying the spear look Riddle explains, "I spend most of my time learning magic. I have ever since I was born," insinuating that he is using a form of magic (perhaps levitation) to carry it and maybe does not have it physically in his arms at all.

(Vil explains that the spears are difficult to control in attack-mode due to the amount of energy they give off.)

And that asks questions about levitation that I have always wondered about!

During Glorious Masquerade Epel is only capable of carrying one crate of apples at a time.

When Malleus levitates an entire apple truck Epel comments, "I'm pretty sure only Malleus could pull off a feat like that…"

Are levitation and physical strength connected? Malleus says that he is physically stronger than humans even without his magic, so he does not serve as a good example.

Is Epel only capable of levitating one crate of apples because that is the limit of what he would be able to accomplish physically? Or do his magical limitations mirror his physical limitations by coincidence?

We know that Leona is extremely powerful (re: Leona's Power). Is Leona both physically stronger than an octopus mermaid and magically stronger than Azul, or is Azul physically stronger than Leona, but his magic wasn't enough for the spear?

And then there is the fact that Azul is, magically, extremely strong:

Jade comments that Azul's unique magic is too strong for even him to control (which is why he designed the golden contracts--to artificially rein himself in). Does that apply to all of Azul's magic, or is it just his UM?

Someone with the muscle of an octopus and a magic too strong to be wielded by its own user seems like they should be able to control a thunder spear on their own--but maybe Leona is just that strong? 🦁

To the original question:

Yes! It is canon that Floyd has said that Azul is insanely strong, and Azul himself has repeated it, but--

edit:

Ahhh thank you very much to the anonymous asker who mentioned Azul's Tapis Rouge vignette! 🥳 In-game example of Azul flexing his physical strength!!📝

And thank you to @basuralindo for the reference to Azul prying Stitch off of the prefect! 🐙 (Azul: "You might've thwarted my efforts entirely if we hadn't been underwater.")

And thank you again to @basuralindo and @mellosdrawings for the Vargas Camp references!! 📝

In a vignette we have Azul volunteering to carry a load of wood for Kalim. He pretends to be struggling under the weight in order to leave a lasting impression of his efforts, but as we cannot tell how much wood there is that he is hauling it can be difficult to tell how heavy it truly is--but then there is Vargas👀

At Trey's request, Jade and Azul are assigned the task of evacuating a bound Grim and Vargas from the mine. Jade takes Grim and runs away, leaving Azul behind alone with the prefect to handle Vargas--did he know that Azul would not struggle with carrying him?💪

Azul does ask for the prefect's help, but only because he is worried about bumping Vargas' head against the rocks--he does not say anything about struggling to carry him!

And this sounds very similar to a comment from Malleus on carrying Idia and Azul through the narrow stairwells of the bell tower during Glorious Masquerade! 🐉🐙

[mongoosingisme]

Okay, hear me out, I'm sure this has probably been done a lot but, it's the 1st year of the flower dance and fem!farmer wooed shane up to 8 hearts. Farmer attends the festival in the proper attire (a pretty white dress and heels) and seeing shane all dressed up makes her all hot and flustered. She obviously asks Shane to dance and he begrudgingly agrees, but they instead sneak off into the forest for a little bit of "fun" instead. Protection? It wasn't planned soooo....oops. Pull out game? Weak. 🫣 They return to the festival afterwards for some sly comments from the others.

HELLO FRIEND!

I've tried to write this several different times, and then I got angst-pilled and wrote some other stuff and it all came together.

So... yes. A continuation of the couple other Shane fills I posted this week (here and here). Had to massage the ask a little bit (picturing it as being between 4 and 6 heart events), and it came out probably a little more dark/angsty than such a lighthearted ask would probably warrant so... uh, yeah.

(seriously, though, reach out if you want me to take another swing that isn't connected to other stuff and is maybe a little more light and bright).

Gonna be one more in this series that'll wrap it up.

Okay! No more housekeeping!

Title: (still don't know what to call these things - doc was named "Shane dance req")

Pairing: Shane x fem!farmer

Word Count: 4170

Rating: Explicit - 18+ only, if you would be so kind

Tags and fic under the cut!

Tags: Shane real real sad, alcoholism/depression stuff, blow jobs, vaginal sex, unprotected sex, super weak pullout game, not great examples of communication

When Shane was a kid Marnie had this dog. Ugly fucking thing, all drool and rough fur and this shit eating grin.

He loved that dog. He’d crawl into Shane’s bed at night, lay his head over his hip, all heavy and warm and stinking and love.

But then one summer the dog wasn’t there anymore. He had killed a chicken. Big teeth, thin neck, a mess of blood and feathers. You couldn’t have a dog that killed chickens around a farm, so he had to go live somewhere else.

Shane knew how that dog felt.

The farmer. He’d gotten a taste, and he wanted more.

Shane worked very hard not to want things.

Shane was failing.

It felt heavy. Everything felt heavy. 

“Are we gonna talk about all that?” She’d asked it a few days later at the saloon, voice quiet and soft, making sure Emily was elsewhere.

“Nope.” It was all that needed to be said. All that he could possibly say.

“Okayyyyy…” Her mouth was in a flat line. Another kind of honest look. Then she looked away, rested her cheek in her hand.

He wanted to be her hand.

He could still taste her.

He wanted more. It nagged at him. Made it all heavier. An unfinished task. Like if he did it maybe he could finally find some relief. Check the last box. 

He had a drink. It helped cover up the taste.

He should do with himself what Marnie did with the dog. Send himself off somewhere else, where there was less potential for pain.

That place didn’t exist, though. So he let himself sink.

Into drink, yes, of course, but also into the farmer. Because she was still there, somehow, still warm and real and honest and when he made her laugh he still felt like maybe there was a good reason for him to be on earth after all.

They spoke more. Sitting on the dock in the chilly early spring air. Or, most nights, at the Saloon. Slouching against the bar, lost in the way she managed to drag words out of him, circumventing the invisible boot that always felt like it was pressing into his throat. The teeth around his neck.

She saw more too. What he looked like when he was low. In his natural state, radiating spikes of pain that punctured the people closest to him.

It was okay. He had room for shame.

He didn’t have room for her, though, and the feelings she ignited in him. Feelings he could name (hope, joy, connection) but would not, would never, could never admit, because they were the feelings that didn’t stick around, and the holes they left behind were so much more painful than if they hadn’t been there at all.

The alcohol helped, for the most part.

It might be a problem.

———————

Shane was an atheist, but if he thought it would make the farmer stop showing up in dresses he could absolutely be convinced to pray.

Spring. Flower Dance. He was there. It made Jas and Marnie happy to see him there. He owed them that. Owed them the suit and the bow tie. Owed them the freshly shaved face and combed hair. Owed them the flask left at home.

Well. Two out of three wasn’t bad.

He spotted the farmer before she spotted him. This was a good thing - he’d probably have a stroke if he had to speak while processing what he was seeing. She was in a dress again. White this time. Light and floating around her knees. Pretty shoes that made her a little taller (his height exactly, if he figured correctly).

She looked radiant. That pure sun smile. Those warm, endless eyes. Hair done special and necklace on and bright and shining and kind and open and he wondered if he’d feel the same if she came up to him and took his hand in front of everyone and

(fuck no absolutely not, this was not what we are thinking about…)

Her shoes made her walk a little differently, back arched a bit, calves shapely. He could see the backs of her knees. She’d be soft and sensitive there. He could run his fingers back and forth over her skin, make her gasp and squirm.

(he knew what it sounded like when she gasped now, knew the sharpness of the intake, the gentle ‘hah’ that followed, knew a few ways to make her make that sound but there would be more, there would have to be more, so many ways to make her gasp that he hadn’t found yet…)

Her neckline wasn’t plunging, not exactly, but gathering, sleeves dropping off her shoulders in a way that insisted he trace his gaze across her chest.

(he’d touched her there, once, just the once, just his hands, he should have used his mouth, could have marked her, it would have faded by now but he’d know the spot, could look at her and remember how it’d felt to press his mouth there, but all he could do now is imagine and stare and…)

Shit. He was starting.

He focused quickly on the table in front of him.

Food was something to do, at least.

Take her taste out of his mouth.

He grabbed a macaron.

“Is that a bow tie?” She’d sidled up to him. 

He focused on the cookie, and the way his flask felt heavy in his pocket. “Don’t say a thing.”

She just smiled. “You look so perky! Like you’re about to round out a barbershop quartet!”

“Yoba’s Light, must you?”

“Or like you'll try to sell me a clarinet or something. Mr. Music Man!”

“Leave,” he said. “Go be somewhere else.”

“Only if you agree to dance with me!” Bright eyes. Sunshine smile.

“I would rather snort lead paint dust than dance at this thing,” he said. The cookie was dry in his mouth. Cloying and sweet.

The farmer’s sweetness was different. 

If she asked him to dance again he was going to say yes.

He needed a drink. 

“Hey kids!” Emily was there, sneaking the last macaron from under his fingers. “You dancing today?”

“Yes,” the farmer said.

“No,” Shane said.

Emily raised her eyebrows. “You two better get your stories straight.”

“Dance with me?” No bright eyes. No sunshine smile. Just her, sweet like a maple candy he’d had once, melting away on his tongue like it was never there in the first place, but the flavor remained.

“You’re not going to leave me alone until I say yes, are you?” 

“Nope!” She waved to someone over his shoulder. 

“Fuck,” Shane muttered, just to himself, then “fine.”

She smiled, small and controlled. There was a bit of impishness in her eyes. “Perfect. You’ll have to teach me the steps though.”

“Fuck,” he said, for her this time. 

She laughed. 

It all felt lighter, just for a moment. It made him feel like he was spinning up and up.

What goes up must come down.

“Show us how it’s done!” Emily was grinning over a madeleine.

Shane felt like he was losing control over the situation. 

As if he had any to begin with.

“I am not giving you a dance lesson in front of all these people.” He grabbed a fistful of meringues, popped a couple in his mouth. They dissolved instantly.

Not like her. She melted but she lingered.

“So go find a quiet spot and teach her!” Fucking Emily. She always knew exactly what she was doing. 

“Great idea! Come on!” And the farmer was holding his hand now, pulling on it, off towards the woods, and something was skipping in his mind, stuttering, trying to keep up because he absolutely felt the way he thought he would if he she did that, light shining through his body (hand to shoulder to heart to throat), a crushing weight lifted, and he could loosen if he wanted to, in the wake of it, but he tensed instead, because the holding of a hand implied a hand eventually letting go, and it all comes crashing back down so much harder when it gets lifted for a moment.

Emily winked, gave him a little wave as his feet moved without his approval.

The farmer’s hand was solid. Warm. Calloused. Strong. 

He wondered what the callouses would feel like if they rubbed against his lips. If they trailed over his stomach. If they wrapped around his -

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in something that didn’t have the word ‘Joja’ on it.” 

They were walking, just walking, hand in hand like it was the most casual thing in the world.

“How else am I supposed to feel like I’m thriving?”

The farmer snorted. Then, soft and sincere: “you look really good.”

What do you say to that?

“Thanks, you too,” he finally muttered.

“Don’t I?” She smiled at him. “Took me an hour to get my hair together. I used to take an hour on my hair every morning when I lived in the city. I can’t even imagine what it would feel like to have that much free time now.”

Shane made a sound of acknowledgement. 

One of the nice things about the farmer was that she rarely required him to have something to say.

“Think this spot is good?” They’d wandered off on a side trail, ended up in a little clearing.

Shane was struck by the fact that they were alone together. This was very rare.

Shane was struck by the fact that the farmer was absolutely beautiful, looking at him all gentle and at peace and like she was just where she wanted to be.

Shane was struck by the fact that he wanted her. He always wanted her, but it was suddenly so much more intense, so overwhelming, because she was right there, looking at him the way he looked at her, like she saw something she wanted, like she was looking at something worth wanting, and he wanted to drop to his knees.

“Yeah, this is fine,” he managed. 

“So how does it go?” She was looking at him expectantly.

“Huh?” 

“The dance. The one we’re supposed to be practicing. Is your tie restricting blood to your brain?” She reached out, fiddled with the bow.

Shane reached up and grabbed her wrists without thinking. They fit so nicely in his hands. “Don’t,” he said. “That took me twenty minutes to tie.”

He didn’t let go.

He could feel her pulse thrumming.

Her cheeks were a little flushed.

Her eyes dipped down to his mouth.

(It could happen it could happen he could check that box right now and be done with it and it would be fine, it would be okay, it was nothing to worry about because it’d be over and he’d know and the taste would be gone and he could finally finally move on…)

He rubbed his thumbs over her wrists. Slow.

“We’re going to have to talk about this at some point.” She sounded breathless. 

“Yeah,” Shane lied. Then he moved her.

There was a simplicity to bodies that Shane appreciated. A kinetic intelligence that had always been with him. Move this way and that will happen. Apply pressure here and see results there. It had made him a monster on the gridball field, taking down larger players with ease and precision.

Shane knew where his strengths lay.

He knew how to move a body. So he didn’t need to think about how to angle his grip to make the farmer take a step backwards. And it was easy to crowd into her space, press his forehead against hers, make her shift and stumble where he wanted her to go - up against a boulder that he knew would support her just where she needed it, on her shoulders, her hips, the arch of her back as he pressed her against it.

His mouth was on her skin, her neck, but only for a second because her hand was in his hair, pulling him up, making him look at her.

Her eyes.

He tried not to groan.

“Promise me,” she said. “Promise me we’ll talk about this.”

“I promise,” Shane lied.

(it was okay, he had infinite…)

“Okay,” she said, fingers loosening.

He wished they wouldn’t. He wished they’d stay right there, strong and harsh and demanding and showing him exactly what she needed, exactly what he could give her that wasn't a lie.

“Okay,” she said again, and his mouth was falling.

Dresses. Fucking dresses. So different from flannel and denim. So easy to move. Those sloping sleeves that dropped with the slightest nudge, baring curved shoulders and long neck and mounded flesh and skin and skin and skin and skin and skin.

And there it was. That gasp. She made it as he raked his lips across her chest.

(soft and warm, always, every part of her so soft and warm…)

She smelled incredible, like cedar and lavender and soap and just a little bit of sweat, and her chest was moving, heaving up under his mouth as he kissed her, mouth open and lax, chin and cheeks sliding, smooth for once (though part of him craved the friction, the resistance, the reddened skin that proved he was there).

Dresses. Fucking dresses. With tiny zippers in the back that were a bitch to get a good grip on, but once you did they came down so easy, and fuck, the farmer, so put together with a pretty strapless bra that he could pull down like it was nothing. 

Her breasts were warm and heavy as he cupped them. She sighed, pressed up into him.

A sigh was good.

A gasp was better.

He squeezed, observed the indentations his hands made in her flesh. She gasped, arching her back against the boulder.

“There you go.” He wasn’t sure if he said it or thought it. 

Her nipples had tightened, two pebbled tips, and it felt right and good and needed to pinch at them, thumbs and the sides of his forefingers.

(fuck, just like he thought, just like he dreamed, those sounds, sounds like “yes,” like “more,” like his name all broken and gaspy because she loved it, loved his fingers and his hands and his voice…)

“There you go.” He was definitely saying it out loud, and she was whimpering in return. 

His mouth wanted to say more. 

He filled it with her instead. Sucked. Grabbed at her hips as she arched again. Memorized the way she moaned. The way she tasted. Felt her tremble as his teeth scraped over her. Tried not to groan as her hands made their way back to his hair.

He failed.

"That feels so good," she was whispering, and it went straight to his cock. “So fucking good, Shane.”

(His name his name his name his name…)

The other side now. Sucking and scraping and groaning, he couldn’t help it, the sound ripping out of his throat because her hands kept holding him there. 

But then they were pulling, and he was letting her go, and she was saying “I owe you” with the cutest fucking little smile. He didn’t know what she meant until she lowered herself to her knees in front of him, and then he knew exactly what she meant.

Her hands. On his belt. His pants. Pulling. Tracing over his hips. Wrapping around his cock. She was gentle, looking up at him with eyes that were happy and present and just a little mischievous and she looked good, so fucking good down there

.

(So good, such a good fucking girl for him, down on her knees like that with her dress pulled down for anyone to walk by and see her, see her like that, all undone for him, all down on her knees with that smile that felt like a kiss, hot and dirty and intimate and he wanted to kiss her, drag her back up by her hair and…)

She flicked her tongue against the head of his cock, then took it into her mouth. 

He groaned.

Her lips stretched around him, warm, hot, so hot he was dying. 

He needed more.

He reached for her head, her hair, but she slapped his hands away, drew back to say “you mess up my hair and I’m ripping out your bow tie.”

Of course she’d make him laugh like that. 

“Noted,” he said. He realized his voice sounded warm.

And then she was on him for real, mouth stretching down, enveloping him, soft and suction and heat and wet and perfect. So perfect. He wanted to tell her, to unlock his throat, to let the words fall out

(So good so good so fucking good for me sucking my cock like this out in the open, so pretty for me on your knees, fucking made for me aren’t you, fucking made for this…)

But he pressed his lips tight. Closed his eyes. Let the entirety of all that was him rest at the point where her mouth stroked his skin.

It felt like light. Like letting go.

He wanted to let go.

But not yet. 

Now or never, he realized. 

He had to see. Had to check that box. Put it behind him.

He grabbed her hair, pulled her face back. She went easily, looked up at him. Her lipstick was smudged, her eyes a little wet.

He was going to make a mess of her, wasn’t he?

“Are you fucking kidding me?” It was the hair, he realized. 

Well. In for a penny, in for a pound. He kept one hand on her head, used the other to rip out his bow tie, and then he was pulling, something deep in him filling at the way she gasped, different this time, excited, anticipating, an edge of pain.

(Gonna make a mess of her, make a mess of this…)

She was easy to move, so pliant, goosebumps pricking up her arms as he settled her stomach and chest against the rock. He leaned against her, let her feel his weight. His mouth was by her ear. He let his lips touch it. Not a kiss, just a touch. Like his hand that had come around to cup her neck. Just a touch. Just a touch.

She was moving. Hips hitching back, rubbing against him. Throat flexing as she spoke: “Shane, fuck, I need you… Yoba, just fuck me, please.”

Her light. From her throat through his hand to his shoulder to his mouth. Filling it with her taste, too much, too full to keep the words inside, so as he reached up under her dress, pulled her underwear down, pressed his fingers against her he started to speak.

“Fuck, sweetheart, you’re so fucking wet for me, look at you.”

The words made her moan, or maybe it was his fingers working up inside of her. 

“You’re gonna feel so good, aren’t you? Gonna be good for me?”

He barely knew what he was saying, but she was agreeing with it, nodding, whining, moving her hips.

“That’s my girl. That’s my fucking girl.” He had to let go of her neck to get his hand around his cock, to rub it against her, so wet and welcoming, so warm, so fucking warm, all the time, like sunlight, pulling him in, (“I’ll pull out” “fuck, just do it”) deep, deeper, and he could feel her shift around him, making room, making space with a whimper and a whine and a groan (though maybe that was him) and he was enveloped and it was all lifting, lifting off of him, the weight, and fuck if there was space, if there was room in his life for good he could enjoy it, live in this moment, let it fill him and brace him and fix him like some idiot part of his brain still thought was possible.

But there wasn’t space.

So this had to be it.

She was looking over her shoulder at him. Her cheeks were flushed, eyes soft and hazy. Beautiful. So beautiful she couldn’t possibly be for him. “You feel good,” she said. 

If only there were space.

“Baby…” It fell out, looking in her eyes, and it made her smile, and it was fucked, it was all fucked, wasn’t it, because he couldn’t go back, couldn’t unfeel her, couldn’t unsee her, couldn’t let go of her taste.

There was nothing left to do but what his body was screaming for. 

To move.

An arm around her waist. A hand around her neck. Lips fastened on her shoulder. Hips shifting, ears listening, and yes, a gasp, a tightening, and so he did it again, felt her groan reverberate through his hand (hand to shoulder to heart), and then there was rhythm, something to follow, to fall into, to finally finally shut his mind off for one damn minute and feel.

Cool stone seeping in through his elbow.

Soft skin so easy to mold and move.

The farmer. Tight around him. Squeezing and taking. Giving back movement and sound and if he weren’t so far gone, so caught up in her he’d worry that they might carry, that someone might hear, but there was nothing on his mind, a merciful blank, a space, there was space, space that he could fill with her, like he was filling her.

(fuck fuck fuck he was doing it he was doing it he was here and she was here and they were moving together and it was like floating it was like falling it was like waking up it was like going to sleep it was like climbing it was like slipping it was nothing and everything and)

He wanted her to want this like him. Remember this like he would. He dropped his hand from her throat, found her clit, all wet and swollen and (fuck fuck fuck) her sounds were changing, breathier, rising in tenor and tension and he needed it, needed her to feel it too, how the weight could lift.

“Yes,” she was saying, over and over. Voice tight and shaking, trembling under him, hitching and tightening in a way that made his stomach drop, his hips tighten, his mind go blank and 

(oh shit oh shit oh shit too much too much can’t move can’t think can’t breathe can’t fucking…)

He was making a mess of her.

Like he made a mess of everything.

For a moment it all lifted.

In an instant it all came crashing back down.

“Fuck, did you…?” She was looking over her shoulder as he was pulling out, pulling away. Eyes (those eyes, those pretty pretty pretty eyes) still blown dark. Hair unkept. Lips swollen, like she’d been biting at them.

He wanted to push right back into her again. 

He wanted to run. 

“I… shit…” What the fuck do you say to that?

She was turning, rearranging her clothes, and there were things he was supposed to say, feelings he was supposed to be having, but there was no room for them, none, (only shame, infinite room for shame) but still she was there, and her hand was on his cheek. “We have to talk about this, Shane.”

“I know.” It wasn’t a lie. But it wasn’t a promise either.

“They’re going to miss us at the dance. We need to get back but…” She sighed. Stoked a thumb over his cheek.

(How? How? How did she have space for him, still, with all that was falling and all that was crushing and all that was him?)

The words were all caught up in his throat.

He needed a drink.

She was fixing his tie. Smoothing her hair. Swiping at her lips. Undoing the mess he made.

He wanted to fall to his knees.

“Come on.” She held onto his hand, led him back to the festival.

She had an infinite capacity for love, he realized. He could bask in it. Photosynthesize. Wrap that vine around her and let it grow and grow and grow until eventually it choked out everything around it. Thick and thorny and invasive, winding around her neck, impossible to remove once those roots got deep.

“Your bow tie’s a little crooked.” Emily. Back at the dance. The farmer was off making her rounds. 

He wondered if she could still feel him inside of her. 

“Did you two have fun dancing? You missed the big show.” Em was futzing with his tie, and his arms felt too heavy to bat her away. 

“Fucking hate this festival,” he said. 

“There’s always next year.” She ruffled his hair. 

Shane said nothing. Watched the farmer. Tried to decide if her walk was different. If her shoulders sloped. If she could feel his weight. 

He could feel it.

What he carried.

What pressed in on him.

Like a boulder on his back.

Like teeth sharp on a throat.

Her taste was still there.

It wouldn’t go away.

And Shane had to decide if he could live with the consequences.

You can find a part four here if you're interested. Totally cool if you're not tho.

Masterlist

[fallingdownhell]

May I request Zhongli, Itto, Kaveh and Cyno with an s/o who's got crazy good luck? They could win any challenge or game presented to them, never get hurt (to badly), and are always making loads of cash (somehow).

I can imagine at least one of those characters getting jealous over something like this.. Characters Included: Itto; Cyno; Zhongli; Kaveh Content: gender neutral reader; established relationship; crack??; some fluff and comedy; nothing too serious here, just some funny headcanons Word count: 942 words Have fun with this<3

Itto

the man, the myth, the legend himself..

he gets SO incredibly jealous. When he challenges you jokingly at first, and you keep winning against him..

His pride is on the line here, okay?

you win a match of TCG against his amazing deck? That's fine, he can always challenge you for another round

but when you keep on winning and winning, he gets more and more desperate with each passing round

okay, screw TCG. How about a beetle fight? He's sure to win this, no doubt about it!

...what do you mean he lost again?

he's heartbroken. Will fall to the ground in disbelief. Have the gods truly forsaken him now?

a little drama queen about it, but it wouldn't be the Itto you know and love if he wouldn't act like this

still, you do feel a bit bad about it. To the point where you decide to only do the bare minimum and let him win against you, so he'll cheer up again

when he does win, his spirit is back up again immediately, bloating about his superior victory for the rest of the day. Like, seriously, he won't shut up about it anymore

unless someone were to mention all his previous losses, then he's back to sulking again

however, the next day, all is forgiven and forgotten again

Cyno

one night, after dinner, he was talking about his new deck in TCG when you decided to ask him if he could teach you how to play

immediate sparkles in his eyes as he gets all excited and pulls out a new set of cards for you. He's been waiting for this day to come!

takes his time to explain the rules to you and helps you build your deck. If you ask him questions, he answeres them paitently

then comes the time for your first duel. Even though you are his partner and it's your first ever match, he doesn't plan to go easy on you. Well, maybe a bit, but he still will take this match very seriously

But when you end up winning against him, he's dumbfounded. How did you manage to do that?

He'd quietly mumble something about beginners luck, then challenges you to a rematch. This time, he plans to go all out

...and he looses again

now thourougly confused, he's looking at his cards like he might find the answer in them, while you are laughing your ass off. Your stomach hurts from all the laughing, but you can't calm down. Cyno's just so cute when he looks so shaken up

it's a mystery to him, how you could win against him, despite him having the better cards, the better deck and obviously having more expierence playing the game

in the end, he does swallow down his pride and congratulates you to your win, though he will work his deck over and challenge you again at a later point in time

Zhongli

as an adventurer, it is unavoidable that people get injured every now and then. It's just a risk that comes with the profession

and yet, Zhongli has never seen an injury on you more severe than a cut and maybe some darker bruises

don't get him wrong, he's glad that you're not getting hurt all the time. It's just that your stories and the results don't match up most of the time

"And get this. Then, a huge rockfall comes falling down in our direction! Can you imagine that?" "Darling, that's very serious. How did you manage to avoid that?" "I don't know. Guess I just got lucky. I only got hit my a small one on the head, but it wasn't even big enoug to give me a concussion, so all's good!"

"I almost fell down a cliff today!", "A group of Ruin hunters attacked us today!", "We got locked in a cave, but luckily, they were connected to other caves, so we got out no problem."

almost every other day, you come home with a similar story and every time, Zhongli questions just how much luck one single human can possess to come out mostly unharmed every single time

still, every time you set out for work, he can't help but worry about you. What if one day, your luck runs out on you? You reassure him that you're careful, but it does little to appease his mind when you come home with yet another tale to tell...

Kaveh

Kaveh isn't one for gambling, never has been and never will be. Though, he knows that you like to induldge from time to time, so when you invite him to come along with you, he agrees

and then he witnesses you winning each and every game you partake in. Doesn't matter how rigged the games might be, you make it look so simple

with a huge grin on your lips, your arms raise into the air as you declare your victory one again, and he's left dumbfounded

when he catches a quiet moment, he can't help but ask you about it

"I don't know. I just always had really good luck when it comes to those type of games.", would be your nonchalant explanaition

now he gets why you don't go out to play more often. You'd get banned from every single location if you were to do this regularely

Going home from a place like this with such a massive win.. he's too stunned to speak, but nonetheless very impressed and proud of you for it

will accompany you more often when you want to go out to gamble again, just to see your excited and joyful expression again

[russsiangirl]

art donaldson x reader headcanons ( both young and dilf art.. ) both banners by me!

starting off strong with young art ( heheh )

i feel like y'all met for a goofy reason

either he asked you for a piece of gum in a class because he ran out

that boy NEEDS his gum he can't live without it ( oral fixation? idk )

OR he saw you on the tennis court when you were meeting up with a friend of yours

you had heard of him of course, he had won the one tournament with his friend

but,, he sadly had his eyes on tashi duncan, not that you could exactly blame him, you've seen her - all lean muscle and tan skin.

that is until tashi starts dating patrick

he's kinda like a kicked puppy , a very jealous one

he's desperate to get his mind off of them, so he finds you

you're perfect for him, you're sweet, pretty, kind. but you're also pliable.

art's seen the way you'd look at him with those pretty eyes when he asked you a question, the way you would slightly stumble over your words

he would wanna laugh sometimes, not in a mean way, more of a 'how cute..' kinda way, yk?

he's a mastermind,, maybe manipulative but that just makes it better

he taps your shoulder one day and is like "hey so would you like,, wanna go out sometime?"

now you thought that he was just gonna ask for help with the assignment, but this- this was unexpected, but good. really good.

you obviously say yes & it goes great! after a couple dates you two start something that resembles a relationship

art is a sweetheart, buying you gifts, treating you to dinner when he can, taking you to his games - model boyfriend!

he loves being romantic and spending quality time with you

also double dates with tashi & patrick ( tension )

you notice the way patrick looks at art and you suspect something. had something happened between them?

you had heard about how tightly-knit the two of them were and something just didn't seem right

so after the date and you two go back to the dorm or wherever y'all are staying you ask him what was up with him and patrick

art shuts down, not saying anything and goes completely silent.

he's not one to talk about things like these or his past

art likes to talk as much as he loves to listen

like if you found a new interest and/or hyperfixation he would listen to you and find so endearing

he loves the way you get so excited and you just beam at him whenever you do something that makes you happy, it makes him just as equally happy

art also loves when you wear his clothes, he finds it funny how they drape over you since he's like six foot.

art does like being praised ( take that as you will ) but when you're reassuring him, especially after his games or practice or anything he just wants to shower you with all the affection he can muster <3

this is my late fathers day present to y'all.. enjoy

ah yes, art as a father, my favorite

he's not married at this point ( sadly no tashi, they got divorced )

he's a lot more tired than he was back in college, obviously

y'all definitely met at some sort of event, you were a reporter for a sports magazine who had sent you to cover whatever it was that you were there for

you just didn't know it would involve art

when you first see him, you didn't really know what to expect - but not this

art with his short-cropped sandy hair and pretty blue eyes and blonde lashes, he looks ethereal, almost like he doesn't belong here

he was distracted most of the interview, too distracted by you with your sweet voice and nice hands and silly questions

so you two rescheduled, over dinner! win-win, you get to spend more time with him and you get your job done

the two of you connect really easily and you agree to do this again, without the interview part

there's something about the two of you thats so entrancing to each other

IMAGINE WITH AN AGE DIFFERENCE

like you're 21 - 22 and he's like 32.. it only makes him crave you more, he can show you things you've never seen

you might be a bit skeptical, but art is telling you that you can trust him, he won't push boundaries, none of that and you do trust him

he does let you meet lily eventually and when you do, you're enamored with her, she's so sweet and you could see art in her

you knew about his past relationship with tashi, but you didn't mind

but older!art is also romantic, sure the paparazzi is interested in the two of you - so most of the dates are at home. he likes it better that way

ough,, this was a LOT - late father's day present yk.. i love you guys - enjoy this! like and follow if you enjoyed these hehe

[baby-yongbok]

Hide & Seek

Lee Felix x Fem!Reader

Genre: Fluffy Fluff - Friends to Lovers (One Shot)

Word Count: 2,231

A/N: Happy Birthday Dear Felixxx, Happy Birthday To You! + Maybe I'm being hard on myself but I don't feel the most confident behind this one? Let me know what you think, I tried.

✨Masterlist✨

Summary: You and Felix grew up together but haven't had the time to connect since he's become an idol. Thanks to Hyunjin you're able to visit Felix for his birthday and the two of you decide to play around like old times. When one thing leads to another the two of you get to say what you've been wanting to for years.

Warnings: Tickling

“Come out, come out wherever you are.” Felix’s deep voice can be heard vibrating off of the walls of the quiet living room. The two of you decided to play a game of hide and seek to keep yourselves entertained while the other boys went to ‘Run some errands’ which obviously means that they’re trying to surprise Felix with something for his birthday. 

“Are you under…here” You hear shuffling from the other side of the room and you try your very best to stifle a giggle. “Hmm” 

You can’t help the dorky smile that pulls at your lips as you try to stay as still as possible in the back of the closet. Hide and seek is something that you and Felix used to play when you were pre-teens. You’d meet up at the park after school and play for hours, laughing and running after each other until you had to rush home for curfew. The two of you haven’t hung out much since he became an idol, with him moving to Korea and you moving your life from Australia to Seattle the two of you have barely had the time to schedule a meet up, let alone video chat. So, when you got a text from Hyunjin saying that he wanted to arrange for you to surprise Felix for his birthday you were more than excited to make it happen.

“Ah, I see.” You hear his voice getting closer to your hiding spot and you hold your breath and squeeze your knees to your chest to make yourself fit better into the corner. Felix slowly creaks the closet door open and pokes his head inside. 

“I know you’re in here.” He hums out as he searches the opposite side of the closet. “Hm, maybe she’s over….here!” 

He quickly turns in your direction, moving the coats that you were hiding behind and revealing your hiding spot. You squeal in excitement as you scramble to your knees and start crawling towards the exit. 

“I got you!” Felix laughs as he bends down to stop you from escaping. “I knew you’d pick the closet.”

He teases you as he starts to tickle you lightly. One of the rules of hide and seek that you guys made up when you were younger was that if you’re found in under a minute you get tickled as a punishment. This was your least favorite part of the game since Felix always managed to find you the fastest. 

“S-stop! That’s not f-fair, ugh.” Your laughs filled the air as you fought against him. “Felix, s-stop it!” 

Felix’s laughs mixed with yours in the quiet room, he rolled you over onto your back so that he could see your smiling face as he administered your punishment.

 “You know the rules” Felix tickled you for a few more seconds before stopping and sitting next to you on the floor. You laid out on the hardwood like a starfish as you tried to catch your breath. 

“I’m gonna get you back for that.” You managed to mumble between breaths and Felix chuckled. 

 “You gotta find me first!” He scrambles to his feet and starts jogging towards one of the other rooms. “Count to thirty, no cheating” 

“Yeah yeah yeah” You close your eyes, still laying on the hardwood as you start to count aloud. You hear a door open and a door knob being turned right after. You smile to yourself and shake your head, he’s clearly trying to trick you. ���Ready or not, here I come!” 

You pull yourself up from the floor and take one final deep breath before you start to tiptoe across the hardwood. You notice that two doors that were closed before are now open and you look between them carefully choosing which room to explore first. You remember Felix telling you earlier how the bathroom is such a terrible place to hide so you decide to choose the other door that leads to his room instead. You slowly push the door open trying to avoid any creaking, you tiptoe inside of his dimly lit room, the only source of light being the evening sun shining through the blinds. 

“Oh Felix, where could you be?” You step across the room lightly, checking every space that you can think of. You check behind his thick blackout curtains, in his closet and even behind the door to make sure he isn't trying to sneak up on you but you don’t see him anywhere. Just as you're about to give up you glance towards his bed and notice a stray strand of blonde hair peeking out. You laugh to yourself as you make your way over to the bed and sit on top of it.

“Hm, where could he have gone? I checked everywhere.” You let out a faux sigh of defeat before standing from the mattress. “Oh! Maybe just maybe he’s under… here!” 

You bend down to look under the bed but to your surprise you find nothing but darkness. Your eyebrows furrow and you stand quickly looking around the room for him. Before you can turn around you feel a pair of strong arms lace around your waist and you jump at the sudden contact. A surprised scream leaves your lips and Felix laughs at the reaction.

“One minute and two seconds” He teases as he sways you back and forth with excitement. “I don’t get a punishment!

You whine, pushing him off of you and plopping down on the mattress in front of you. “No fair! You moved.”

“It’s not my fault that you’re a slowpoke.” He sticks his tongue out at you and you groan out in frustration. 

“I’m still gonna punish you for cheating.” You start to push yourself up off of the mattress but you’re quickly stopped by the weight of Felix on your back.

“That’s not how the game works!” You groan at the feeling of him on you as you fight to get him off. “You can’t make up new rules now!”

You struggle to get him off of you for a bit before you finally are able to shift from under him. He wraps his arms around your waist pulling you into him and holding you close.

“Get off of me you cheater!” Your chuckles and grunts fill the air as the two of you playfully struggle with each other. He tickles you here and there and you do the same earning some whiny laughs from him. You roll over on top of him straddling his waist and start to tickle his most sensitive spots. 

“Hey!” He laughs as you tickle him, barely fighting against you. 

“You’re not even trying to defend yourself.” You tease as you continue to tickle him. 

“I was t-trying to be nice!” He bites back in between giggles. You scoff at him, stopping the punishment for just a second to allow him to catch his breath.

“Yeah sure, just admit that I won. You barely even fought back.” Felix rolls his eyes at you playfully before smirking up at you. 

“Fine.” He grabs your waist and lifts his hips just enough to lift you off of the mattress. He flips the two of you over, his face inches away from yours as he hovers over you. “How’s this for fighting back?”

His question comes out in a breathy whisper as he tries to steady his breathing from your tickle attack. You look up into his eyes quietly as your own breathing starts to become a bit unsteady. Just as you’re about to say something to him you feel his hands on your sides and his fingers start to move against you. You gasp at the sensation before you break out in forced laughter once again. Felix smiles down at you as he tickles you for the hundredth time making your body wiggle beneath him.

“Keep still!” He laughs as he places his knees on either side of your body and straddles your hips to keep you in place. “You wanted me to fight back!”

His fingers move quickly against the fabric of your shirt, tickling your sides and trailing up under your arms. You push against his chest trying to get him to stop but it’s no use. “Felix!”

He  trails back down your sides and when he moves back up you can feel the pads of his fingers against your bare skin. You gasp at the sensation as he trails his fingers under the fabric of your shirt. His movements start to slow as he looks down at the exposed skin of your belly, your shirt riding up more and more as he moves his fingers against you. His digits come to a full stop and rest lightly on your sides as he watches the rise and fall of your stomach carefully. His eyes trail up your belly and chest until they meet your wide ones, your breath catches in your throat as he looks at you, his eyes are asking you a question and you think you know exactly what it is.

“I’ve missed you.” Felix whispers down at you, a meer grin on his lips.

“Felix..” You move your hands to rest on his forearms and his eyes look down to take in the light touch. “You can.”

He quickly looks back up at you, his eyes slightly wide as he tries to figure out what you mean, you couldn’t possibly be saying what he thinks you’re saying, right?

“I can?” He asks in a whisper and now it’s your turn to grin at him. “What are you giving me permission to do?”

“What you wanted to do the day you left.” His eyes are fully wide now and his lips part slightly like he’s just seen a ghost, a slight blush creeps up on his cheeks and you take in the way that his freckles look against the red of his skin.

“You remember that?” He asks, his voice is barely a whisper. 

“Of course, because I wanted you to do it so badly.” You whisper back, he stares down at you as the gears turn in his head, he’s clearly trying to take this all in. “What do you really mean when you say that you’ve missed me?”

“I think you know the answer to that.” His fingers start to slowly move against your skin. A light and innocent touch that makes a shiver run up your spine.

“I want you to say it.” His gaze softens a bit as he takes in a deep breath and starts to lean into you slowly. His eyes trailing from yours down to your lips. 

“Are you sure?” You nod your head as your hands start to slowly move up his forearms.

“Yes.” You breathe out and Felix carefully closes the gap between you two, his chest hovering over yours as your lips connect in a soft kiss. The golden evening sun shining against his honey skin, illuminating the moment. One of his hands lightly grips the exposed skin of your hip while the other softly rests on your cheek. You kiss him back just as gently, your hands trailing up his arms and resting on his shoulders. He pulls away from you for a second and your eyes flutter open to meet his gentle gaze. 

“I love you.” His voice is sweet yet deep and he watches your face for any sign of resistance to his confession. “I’ve loved you for so long.”

His lips brush against yours gently, aching to kiss you again. 

“I love you too.” You whisper and he smiles down at you instantly. 

“You do?” You can tell that he’s trying his best to bite back his excitement. You shake your head, returning his smile. 

“Thank god.” He leans back into you, closing the gap and kissing you a bit harder than before. Your lips glide against each other passionately as you savor the feeling and the taste of him. Your arms wrap around his neck pulling him closer to you, his chest now resting lightly against yours. You feel his fingers gently tangle into your hair and you sigh at the feeling. Felix whines lightly as he tries to get closer to you, he’d melt into your body if he could, anything to get the most out of this moment. He presses his forehead against yours and his other hand moves from your cheek to the side of your neck. You pull away from him slightly to break the kiss and Felix groans lightly in protest.

“We need to breathe.” You chuckle as you try to catch your breath, your heart is beating a mile a minute and you know that his is too. 

“You’re all the air I need.” You giggle lightly as he smiles down at you. 

“Softie.” You tease as he rubs his nose against yours.

“Only for you.” He kisses the tip of your nose and you scrunch your face at him. 

“Oh?” The two of you hear a voice from the other side of the room and turn towards the door to find a surprised Chan staring back at you.

“What?” You hear another voice ask before Hyunjin and Minho stick their heads into the room 

“Oh?” The two say in unison. 

“I called it” Hyunjin smiles as he pulls back and pushes Chan’s shoulder.

 “You owe me ten bucks.” 

[centrally-unplanned]

Watching Tantacrul's analysis of "Facebook and its discontents", as it were, which is a good video even if I disagree with a bunch of it (I don't assign as much credence to the "social media is causing mental health crises" arguments, even if I am open to them, and am far more skeptical of the case of the "misinformation" proponents). What I do think is valuable is that Tantacrul was himself a large facebook user - not only professionally as a musician and game designer, but personally as one of those people who adopted it in his mid-20's right when it launched. He had the complete prelapsarian experience that Facebook, back when it was a tool and not a platform, was supposed to deliver; getting connected to a bunch of old friends, catching up, and sharing things from your personal life (and even effort posts; people did that on FB back then). While surely people do still have that experience on Facebook, it is a footnote of what it does today - few users are there for that anymore.

What strikes me is that there was something inevitable to the decline of that as a service - it relied sharply on momentum and a specific era. Having everyone join Facebook at the same time created a ton of activity and the easy establishment of community - everyone is here and online all in one place, catching up, so lets share things. But while the idea that one tool would Win The Future and be the ur-platform for everything is ofc the dream of every tech CEO, it isn't the dream of the user. "Everyone" made a Facebook in the late 2000's and at least gave the site a shot, so seeing dozens of friendly faces new and old was possible. But for most users it didn't really stick - I gave up on it in days myself, for others it was months, maybe it was a few years but it "getting old" is baked in. Not because the platform Got Worse, but because look, I can text my friends; I don't care anymore about posting a photo for 100+ people to see. The dirty secret of community everywhere is that if it isn't structural, it is temporary; it doesn't inherently generate endless engagement. Over time, you grow bored.

But you know what does generate endless engagement??

The second pillar of the Early Facebook Experience was the era - the internet was young, and "randos fooling around" was the peak of content. Most people weren't bloggers (the fools), most people weren't autistic enough to troll the dregs of Newgrounds for parody Evangelion dating sims (the absolute fools) - the internet just didn't have that much to do. Which meant the content your friends were posting to their facebook wall was as good as anything, right? Their Hot Take on the end of the Second Intifada ("this is a real opportunity for peace in the region") seemed worthy of several dozen back-and-forth debates in the comments. What this model could not anticipate is that its own success in generating online revenue streams meant that professionals would rise to meet the demand of the attention economy, far better than your friends could. Obviously Facebook-as-platform was a perfectly viable place to Share Content, but you do enough of that and someone's graduation photos seem a bit pedestrian in comparison. And again you can just text your friends - Facebook just isn't a good enough medium for all this.

I do think when people look at "the history of website X", there tends to be a lot of focus on the corporate management as the locus for change - the "pivot to video" for ad revenue or whatever. And certainly that is part of the story - I bet Facebook could have, if it had no ambition, stayed a site for people to see what their friends were up to. But that story is the story of website with declining engagement, with less people signing up new accounts as they are busy already on Tiktok, and active users dialing in less than they did. Maybe still better than the current status quo? Possibly, that isn't a debate I am interested in here. Just saying that change is inevitable in these kinds of places.

[causeimcrayzeebee]

Spoilers for chapter 4 so far!

okay ik everyone and their mother is probably talking about this but monomoko seems to be becoming more and more sympathetic for the students and it kinda scares me for her future, considering what just happened w dr kan (KYS!!!!!). im not particularly sure as to why this is happening, maybe the black spots have to do with the memories or the feelings from the deceased students??? i feel like that has to have some significance. also she went and talked to people that were pretty significant to people who died or got killed, like sasaki and okazaki, so i find that intriguing. im still so confused as to how any of monomokos abilities work but hey ojima got a glimpse of the sky! yeah open sky screamed death flags ojima pls stay true to your word. also the yanagi analysis by monomoko was wild lmfao but i did really like seeing that, it was good to get a better idea of who yanagi really wants to protect,,, hes grown on me so much god i love him

TAMBA MISSING KAMIMURA I AM IN TEARS F UGH KKJSJAJEJE sweetie you DO deserve to be alive but this dialogue is so real i can totally see why tamba is spiraling out. her survivors guilt is really getting to her n how she was so careless before n still survived while someone like kamimura who took a bunch of precautions was killed. obviously tamba deserves to live; the question of who deserves to live is as hayashi said, it’s not something anyone has to prove, you just make the most of it. i really love hayashi and tambas interactions ESP in this chapter.

watari adding patches for the people who died in gonna CRY. i wonder what she would’ve said if she had the time to respond to monomoko, that definitely put Okazaki onto the forefront of her mind.

now onto some actual analysis

I think the why do you mourn them question is answered well with tambas sentiments before; they were so young and just died because of the situation they were forced into. Danganronpa is so dangerous too when the people in the killing game are teenagers, who are still learning to make rational decisions, so putting them in a kind of environment that puts pressure on them to make this kind of sacrifice to get out alive and save themselves, a very human instinct.

i had something in my drafts that I was gonna post desperately but might as well talk about it here cause it fits! i think a lot of why the pink cast is in such mourning goes to the kind of lives they live normally. many of them are more isolated, like kamimura or wada, or surrounded by people but not truly by people they can be themselves around, like hiroaki, chiba, and harada. especially considering them being the best in their field, they have lives where it’s hard to make connections with their peers and it’s a genuine one. that’s why hasegawa n kamimura become attached at the hip so quickly; kamimura was able to actually have a friend. this applies to pretty much everyone, and i think that is what is at the heart of the quick connections. they have the ability to be with their peers and don’t have the outside worlds social pressures on them. it’s a horrendous situation ofc, but if it weren’t for the killing game, they wouldn’t have talked to each other even if they did live near each other because of various reasons. i think the original danganronpa was trying to get to this point and it did in some cases, but in others it didn’t and that lead to a lack of mourning from the cast towards the people they lost except maybe one or two people.

tetro casually making me lose my mind yay hope all that made sense

[neatalchemist]

THIS IS ALL MY OPINIONS! obviously made before the whole game came out, this is just my opinions on songs that the characters would either listen to or songs/artists/albums that remind me of them :3

all songs and artists taken out of my liked playlist on spotify 😭 im also making a leander and mhin playlists on there..

(i got carried away erm LOL) you can tell i was heavily into...a couple of trenches in my early teenage years. yes im talking about the emo quartet whatevrr

leander is mania coded argue with the WALL!! to me he is the fall out boy. hes got that charm guys TRUST ME. its definitely not because fall out boy have been my top artist for 5 years in a row now and because i love leander and im connecting them its not that guys trust me. ALSO a little death by tnbh ???? Young and a menace and a little death r his song trust me. Also pitbull..Toes by glass animals. just a fever you cant sweat out by patd

mhin is the smiths coded. big mouth strikes again and please please please let me get what i want especially. i saw someone compare them to julian devorak and that did something to my brain because julian may or may not be on my kinlist. Whatever. SO the smiths, radiohead... just the most depressing self hateful indie ever. Yeah, Yeah. the front bottoms. Shit, alex g as well head in hands. Maybe and hear me out- some mitski JUST A LITTLE FUCK IT the only non sad song might be flight of the crows by jhariah. They make great music btw. (theres no emoji for the emotion i need to convey) Kill me kill me now body by mother mother END ME wheres the animation memes and just Three days grace.

ais is hm. i dont want to say the neighbourhood and chase atlantic but the neighbourhood and chase atlantic. ARCTIC MONKEYS. fuck it, system of a down and deftones too. Seriously unserious. glass animals SPECIFICALLY Zaba. I feel it. Oh and naturally GUY.exe DUH ALSO Tyler the Creator... And Pitbull for this guy too

freek-a-leek for both ais and vere goodnight

vere.... Who is she by I Monster. this is going to be so ooc, Odetari and its so basic La Seine. I absolutely see MARINA here... Choke by IDKHBTFM!!!!? I may be reaching here. Honestly i feel like hed listen to lady gaga :× He said he liked lutists but the closest to that genre ive got is yaelokre and sea shanties (nancy the tavern wench) and they just dont fit him, sorry pooks

KURASSSS i love him ive got a few off the top of my head, hozier, he definitely likes calmer music, judas by lady gaga being the exception. riptide by vance joy and honestly? Mac Demarco and tame impala. He gives me that vibe (and reminds me of nadia from the arcana bcz theyre both serious but can switch up to goofing around just like that) Absolutely cosmo sheldrake, its just that folklore far away nostalgic feeling of magical days trust. Cas too OHHH just ghost bc. Yes.

[hyperfixated-homo]

OW Perks and how they contribute to world building

Building a world off of a shooter game means integrating a lot of information about your main characters through game mechanics. As someone who is both into the gaming and fandom side of Overwatch, I’ve always found it really interesting how the game’s development of it’s characters has carried over to their fandom interpretations. Obviously, voice lines, skins and cinematics are the big things, but character abilities are a super big part of it too. So, being as obsessive over this silly game as I am, I spent a few hours combing through the character perks, and wrote a long ass ramble about how I think it could influence the world building of Overwatch. Like a normal person. <3

First and foremost; this is absolutely not meant to be some sort of study on what could be canon to the Overwatch universe. It’s already been established that the game isn’t “canon”. These are just self indulgent rambles, mostly.

If you want the full list of each character’s perks, here’s my post on that: https://www.tumblr.com/hyperfixated-homo/775376445686071296/all-of-the-new-ovw-perks

If you have any thoughts, please lmk! It’s been a while since I’ve made a long, in depth analysis like this and I’m sure I have definitely missed some things.

So if I was more insane, I would probably make a detailed exploration of how every perk impacts each hero and what it means for them as a character, but that’s. That’s 168 perks. And 43 characters. That’s a lot of things. A few too many. And most of them would just be analyses of where they got their tech from and how that tech works, which isn’t all that interesting to me. Unless it’s about my favourite characters, or something I’m specifically intrigued by,,,,,

Anyways. There are a lot of things to talk about so I’m going to start with how I personally like to view the implementation of perks within the canon (fanon, whatever) universe, which is basically as choices made by characters in the context of the battle. It opens a whole new world of how we can imagine them participating in actual in world battles.

For example- I was watching Flats try the new Doomfist perks, and he mentioned that it was like being able to choose between DPS Doomfist and Tank Doomfist. This sort of thing is a decision that I can imagine him making in canon going in to a fight- should he be focusing on tanking damage so that other Talon agents can finish the mission, or should he leave them be and finish it himself? And that sort of thing applies to any character. Hanzo going for a hit and having to consider if he should focus on stealth (using sonic arrows) or killing his target by any means necessary (using scatter arrows). While yes, these choices are made by us playing the game, they also probably need to be made by the characters themselves. They can’t do everything all at once.

I feel like the introduction of perks could be really interesting in this sense because before they existed, it was sort of up to fans to explore how characters would deal with equipping themselves for what is- essentially- their job. This opens up so many more doors for the active choices the heroes themselves need to make.

Moving on from that, the abilities themselves are fascinating. Some of them I find interesting in general- mostly ones that have a healing element to them. I’ve mentioned at some point that I think it’s interesting that Genji has a perk where he can heal during his Deflect, and I’m really interested in that- how can he do it? My first thought is that it’s connected to the Iris somehow- maybe that spending enough time following Zenyatta’s teachings, he learns how to harness it just the slightest bit. But really, the possibilities are endless. It could be that he’s repairing his mechanical components, sort of like Bastion’s self heal. Maybe it’s something chemical within his body- a sort of biotic injection that gives him an extra boost. There’s a lot of potential ideas here! How many times have we explored how Soldier could use biotic fields- now that can apply to any hero with new self heal perks.

Along that line of thought, the heroes that have gotten new lifesteal abilities (healing while damaging enemies) are also super super interesting. Any character with new lifesteal perks could have so many potential ideas for why they do it. To name them; Hazard, Genji, Junker Queen, and Reaper all have perks that include lifesteal. And for each character, you can come up with entirely new reasons why. Genji’s specifically is a result of his dragonblade- is the dragon literally sucking the life out of his enemies and giving it back to Genji? I have no idea!!! But it’s a cool concept, right?

In that sense I’m very impressed by the specificity of each character’s perks. They work so well with their already existing traits in the Overwatch universe. All of them feel like they could naturally work with the existing ideas of each person’s abilities. It’s a super natural transition, if for the lore moreso than the game itself.

Okay now I’m just going to speedrun some of the more interesting abilities that I’ve found that I just wanted to bring up.

Sigma and Zenyatta can fly/float respectively. First of all, goddamn awesome. Secondly, very interesting how neither really fly- maybe both of them can, but neither want to. After all, Sigma does fly during his ult? So why wouldn’t he do it on the regular? He’s already floating, why not go the extra step? ¯\(ツ)/¯

I’ve already written a lot about it but Soldier’s new stim pack?? So much potential there. Is it a drug? If so who made it? Where did he get it? How does it affect him in comparison to a normal, non super-soldiered person? Does it have long term affects?

Some characters (Hanzo, Freja, ect) have perks where they get increased firing speed if they get hits/kills. I like to imagine that it’s related to adrenaline. Could use that for some interesting character analysis :) (Especially considering how Hanzo’s specific ability is called “Dragon’s Fury”… could connect that to his own bloodlust as a result of being connected to the dragons. Or something. Hmm)

A lot (I think literally all) of Junkrat’s stuff is related to his weaponry. I like to think that it’s because he’s constantly modifying it to fit his own needs- sort of clunkily, but it works, and it’s fun :)

There’s a lot to be said about characters that are initially more on the pacifism side (Zenyatta, Mei, ect) having perks which allow them to do more damage. There are definitely ways to explore character conflicts using their new abilities. This is sort of less about perks and more about them as characters though- I don’t think they’d be happy to use any of their abilities to do harm

Reaper has his soul orbs back!! We can bring back him eating the souls of the dead. Was that ever a thing? Idk. I want it to be. Imagine- Reaper pulling a death blossom in the middle of enemy lines, then collecting their souls in front of whichever of their comrades still live, slowly gaining power… filling the room with more smoke… laughing maniacally all the while… yknow?

Roadhog’s “take a breather” has two perks that he can choose between to upgrade it- either making him faster when he uses it or healing allies. This sort of thing can very easily fit in to how he learns to integrate himself with Overwatch or another group, learning how to share his heals instead of hogging it (no pun intended)

I’m never going to shut up about Sombra being able to heal with hack. There are. So many concepts you can do with that. Especially with how much more of a sympathetic character she’s been portrayed as lately- there could be any number of situations where she had to learn how to do that. Why would she? How could she? Does it work better for certain heroes than others?

Torb can give his allies repairs during battles. Imagine the shenaniganery. Imagine Torbjorn hanging off Reinhardt’s arms or something, trying to fix his rocket booster, while they’re both yelling at each other and everyone else is trying to murder them. I’d animate it if I didn’t suck at it <3

Venture being able to see things while underground is?? So fun?? They’re very bug to me. I like to think it’s like a specified sensor. A sixth sense if you will. Because it’s not like they can actually see, but maybe they can feel the vibrations or something? I don’t know!!

That’s most of the thoughts I wanted to get out, but honestly there’s so much more to explore here. These are just the ones that immediately jumped out at me- I’m sure that just playing with the perks themselves will bring up more ideas. If this is slightly incoherent I apologise lmao. If I come up with anything else, maybe I’ll write something about it

[oswhys]

So, when I played Lucanis’s questline for the first time, I genuinely thought that Illario was going to turn out to also be possessed. I like to try to come up with theories if there's some kind of mystery involved. Obviously, Illario is suspicious from the get-go but if you want to give him the benefit of the doubt you can, after all, grief really does make people act strangely, but not usually immediately after the death. But when he shows up after the defeat of Zara and kills her just as she says “Amatus” upon seeing him there's no doubt he was in cahoots with her. But then something interesting happens, he uses blood magic, some enchanted pin. He still keeps up the act of innocence though. We get further confirmation during the questioning of Zara’s corpse that the two were extremely close, at least from her perspective. But then we get a strange little tidbit from the memories of Lucanis later in his quest line when you're with spite. Lucanis has a memory or maybe it's some warped memory of Zara talking about the cultivation of an Envy demon. 

Zara’s project was to cultivate and bind different types of demons more easily through new techniques. Zara was talented enough to be able to put a demon inside of a non-mage subject, something that shouldn't be possible in the first place, or at least unheard of. She also wanted to cultivate certain types of demons, ones that are more rare and possibly harder to bind. We see the results of most of her test subjects, either walking corpses or bound demons. Let's say she agrees to take Lucanis to be a test subject, thinking the whole thing would just kill him and the terms of her deal with Illario would be met. Let's say shes surprised Lucanis is even able to merge with spite, let alone survive well afterward. Now let's say this gets her thinking, can she replicate this? Can she put demons and spirits into non-mages? Was this a freak accident?

I know I’m speculating a lot here but hang with me. Now I don't know if her scheme is to take advantage of Illarios jealousy and use it to create an envy demon, something rare and hard to bind, but it would naturally be attracted to that much envy in a person. Or maybe it's presented as an opportunity later down the line, that Illario could become an abomination and gain as much power as one, being able to tap into magic even if not in full control would still give him an edge. I don't know, I just think there was a bit more to the story that we don't know about, aside from what we’ve seen in some of the concept art. Which shows something akin to Illario being manipulated by either Zara or some kind of desire demon or??? Just someone in a pool of blood, with horns? But pieces of these ideas got left behind in the game. Fragments of something larger and it drives me up the wall. 

There's an obvious romantic connection between Illario and Zara that is never elaborated upon in conversation, It is a deeply interesting tidbit of information and nothing is done with it. Then there's Zara’s line in Lucanis’ memories of her saying that the conditions of cultivating an envy demon must be perfect (the line that sent me through this spiral). And then there is Lucanis’ log book. His 5th one if you don't save Treviso shares a reading list of books and he writes some notes with his thoughts about each. He says that Spite “trusts nothing to do with envy demons” which to be fair to spite, is reasonable they're… creepy, and envy as an emotion is a huge liar sometimes. 

There's just something there. Obviously, the story got cut up and changed with time but there was a time when I started to think that the reason Illario is so suspicious is that he's a red herring, or he's a patsy, or not in control of himself or being manipulated or SOMETHING. But no he's just… kinda stupid. He locked up his grandmother and kept her alive? IS HE STUPID?

Anyway, I just like the idea of some grander conspiracy or grander narrative and that maybe Illario wasn't all to blame for everything or that he was, and he was actually even more villainous. Being controlled by his own jealousy to the point of madness blah blah blah you see why I’m thinking about this so much now yeah?

[faejilly]

@sarasa-cat replied to your [post]:

Ever since I played SDV for the first time just a little over a year ago (why it took me that long, i do not know), I have been itching to write fanfic for farmer/Sebastian. All I have right now is a lot of scattered headcanon and maybe a few scenes here and there because I don't know what time is anymore. Where did 2024 go?

Sebastian finding comfort and quiet joy sitting by the window in the farmer's house is just <3 <3 <3. What are your thoughts on the whole mess in his family and the reasons why he feels ignored? (as for me, my mind tends to go for the darkest ideas b/c DRAMA)

The other thing I really like about Sebastian being very quietly happier is that he doesn't change either, like, he's still got insomnia, he still needs days away from people (even you), but he explicitly tells you when he's got days like that so you know that's why he's not there, or whatever.

IT'S JUST SO GOOD

But anyways. Rambling!

The first fic thing with Sebastian is obviously you're meeting him when he's feeling exactly like you did at your terrible corporate job (and he also hates terrible corporate jobs, go us) in that he doesn't know where he wants to go but he needs to not be here

so there's this connection in that you get it, but then also this immediate disconnection, because how can you get involved with someone and make it harder for him to get out when he so desperately needs it?

As to why he needs out?

There are a lot of possibles there. I find it interesting that it's pretty clear no one (even his friends) respect his boundaries: everyone feels free to just walk into his room, they interrupt him when he's actually working, which means it's gotta be even worse when he just needs solitude to help balance himself (no wonder he hides away so often, he's just trying to carve out any space at all)

There's a recurring theme with the LI characters who grew up in Pelican Town regarding still living at home with their parents, and respect that may or may not be owed in both directions in that situation, but it's also really clear that, in this specific time and place, none of them have anywhere else to go, and I'm not sure any of their parents take that at all seriously.

Sebastian is the only one of that group who seems to be trying to work and save up enough to change that! And yet his mother doesn't treat him any more like an adult than any of the rest of them get.

Also, for all that the game is very hand-wavey in regards time and ages and etc. it's clear he's not supposed to be all that much older than Maru, which means he and Demetrius have known each other for most of his life.

And yet, Demetrius never once mentions Sebastian in dialogue but talks about Maru quite a bit. (There's even a note on the wiki to that effect in his trivia section.) They clearly have no connection, which is unfortunate enough as adults and pretty close to tragic for whatever age Sebastian was when Robin and Demetrius got married.

As part and parcel of the same thing, he and Maru never hang out together in any of either of their schedules, and only stand near each other at holidays when it's clearly a family holiday, and they're with Robin & Demetrius too. They both have a line or two referencing each other, and they do specify half-sister/half-brother, which as someone with only half siblings that is uh, not how that normally works for most of us.

Maru's got a line about wishing they were closer and that she wanted to have a brother but Sebastian never acted like one.

If you get married, Sebastian's got a line where he assumes she's happy he's gone, and if you have kids he's got one hoping they get along better than he and Maru did.

They have very different views of their relationship, is what I'm saying here.

And for all Sebastian is willing to assume he was the difficult one, they were both children, it's not up to them to treat each other equally, it's up to their parents to treat them equally, and it seems really obvious they didn't.

(Was there something there with Sebastian's father, beyond just a simple previous relationship that didn't work out? Tragic or abusive or just low-grade general shittiness? Because it seems like everyone swung too hard in the other direction, avoiding thinking about or mentioning him For Reasons™️ that are now completely opaque and just help Sebastian clearly be othered.)

Which gets me to my next question, which is: how long has he lived in the basement without windows which he clearly hates? Why didn't his carpenter mother just build another room above ground? She expands your house in ludicrous directions, and even if we ignore that as video game mechanics, she's clearly capable of full sized construction not just furniture or repair or whatever.

And yet.

He's still in the basement without windows while Demetrius gets a lab (does a lab really need to be above ground with windows more than a bedroom? do you know legally most places you can't list a basement room as a spare bedroom unless it has windows?)

And Maru gets a room with its own little yard for her experiments so she's got both more fresh air and potential privacy than anyone else in the family.

And all I can really come to as a conclusion there is that Demetrius has never seen Sebastian as his step-son, and that influenced how he and Maru grew up, and Robin didn't do anything about it; whether she ever tried or not, she's not even trying anymore by the time we meet them.

So Sebastian legit needed to get out of there, and I feel bad when I'm playing different farmers that I don't get to help him do that, more so than I do with the rest of them when they're not romanced. (Probably why I keep coming back to his? Also the frogs and general fondness for odd little critters is SO ADORABLE I am eternally smitten.)

[peachhcs]

how it all began -> podcast episode

hughes!sister x will smith au (samy + will)

a small podcast snippet where samy and will talk about how they got together

1.9k words

here are the small draft blurbs i wrote way back when i started this series that i told y’all i would share. i have a lot of them, so i’ll post them periodically :) this is from where i imagined will and samy talking about each other on podcast episodes they've invited to

au masterlist

"alright, so give me all the juicy details. how did this next step in your relationship come to be?" samy laughed mostly to herself as she fidgeted with the ends of her shirt.

"i mean..i feel like will and i are like..the exact of every best friends to lover trope right now..like i feel like we fit all the stereotypes," the brunette began making the interviewer laugh.

"i don't know..i mean something in our brains just flipped. we only ever saw each other as like..siblings. like we had a brother and sister relationship with one another, but the more i think about it, the more i think it might've just been us suppressing those feelings and playing it off as a family dynamic instead," the girl giggled.

"were your close friends and family ever like..why the hell aren't they together?"

"looking back on it, there was one night when i was like..sixteen maybe? will had just moved to michigan for his development program and he hung out at our house with some of his friends and like..we all had a great time. we just talked and caught up and i got to know his teammates, but after, when they left, my mom..she had this look on her face. i didn't know what look it was at the time and so i was like why are you looking at me like that? she didn't say anything, but she just smiled and shook her head and now, i'm pretty sure it was her seeing the connection will and i had that we didn't even know we had yet," samy explained.

"i feel like there's such a beautiful thing about that though. it's like you guys weren't even trying to be in a relationship, but everyone around you two knew how special of a connection you two have and they were just like..oh yeah they're definitely gonna be together one day," the interviewer nodded.

"i know. i know. it is beautiful because we weren't even really looking for a relationship and..one thing led to another. i always see those posts that say relationships come from the most unexpected person in the most unexpected time," samy smiled.

"i mean you can tell us whatever you want, you don't have to say anything, but if you want, can you talk about like how it happened and what changed?"

"it was this past summer..will was finishing up his dev program and he was like in a different place every weekend so we hardly got to see one another, but he still texted me and called me whenever he could to talk about his game like we always did, so that wasn't unusual..but like i don't know..there was this thought in the back of my head like..i don't even know how to explain it, but it was like i got this feeling in my chest every time will texted or called me and i started realizing that he didn't do this with everyone. really only like me and his sisters. anyways, the draft rolled around and obviously i was gonna be there. my family sat with his family and we were all dressed to the nines. will was locked in, nervous about his pick, all of that. it wasn't until after where we just found ourselves just with each other in the arena and like..we looked at each other and i think that's just when we knew something was changing between us."

"you both felt that change right in that moment?"

"i mean yeah. he looked at me like..a little too long and i was like..oh shit, this is..this is a way different feeling than i'm used to. it wasn't until his draft party in boston when everything sort of..like came out. i can't give too many details, but we ended up talking that night and like..the rest just went from there," the girl laughed a little.

"and i mean, you two have the same collegiate number absolutely coincidentally."

"yeah, i think that was our final tipping point when we found out we got the same number. it was like the universe telling us, okay yeah, you guys definitely belong together," the brunette grinned.

"so is it hard being long distance and like finding out all of this stuff right as you leave for college?"

"yeah, a bit. it was kind of like a punch in the face. we get something good, but it doesn't last for long because will's now states away in boston and i'm still in michigan, but we're making it work. we call everyday and we text everyday. it's also easy because we know how one another works, so we like skipped all the awkward parts of getting to know one another and figuring out each other's quirks because we already know it."

"i think that definitely makes things easier like you said. you don't have to spend time in the awkward stage because you guys already had that growing up."

"yeah, exactly, but yeah, it's been fun opening this side of one another and delving into it more. he's always been there for me and i mean it's like we danced around one another until the time was finally right for our lives to mix together in that way."

—

"so i don't know if you've seen the clips of sam talking about your relationship or not?" will smiled a bit, nodding to say he has seen it.

"i have and i mean everything she said was pretty spot on and i probably couldn't have said it better myself," the blonde chuckled.

"i don't wanna exhaust the subject too much, but i'd love to sort of hear your take on about the change and sort of realization about your relationship with her."

"yeah, just this past summer was when things just changed for us. she was at the draft in nashville with all of us and just like..it was really special having all of my close friends and family there watching me take on another big milestone in my life. samy's always been there for me, so having her there was really great. i think she said after i got picked we ended up in the arena with just us and we were talking briefly and like..yeah it just changed for us in that moment. i realized how lucky i was to have her there and that she took time out of her busy schedule to be there and support me and i was just thinking how no one else would do that for me but her," will said, his smile still painting his features.

"did you like ever have any past feelings for her in that way that you pushed away thinking it'd never be like that?"

"i think maybe when we were like..12 or something. it was like..peak puberty years so i had this thought in the back of my mind like..what if samy and i ended up as something more, but she never seemed into that ever. we were like siblings, so i kind of just let the idea go knowing we wouldn't ever be like that until it started just resurfacing this past year with her."

"i think i asked sam this, but were your close friends or family ever like..why the hell aren't they together?"

"well definitely my teammates knew way before i did. the first time they met her and hung around us and we went back to our places they looked at me and they were like: are you sure you've never thought about her in that way before? so they even knew before i had an idea. my mom at times was definitely suspicious and surprised that we never got together because i think she was secretly rooting we would at some point," the hockey player laughed.

"moms and friends always know. always trust what they say," the interviewer also laughed.

"i know, i should've listened to them more. even at sixteen where samy and i still saw each other as siblings they were skeptical. especially ryan. he was giving us eyes and anytime we hung out with her he was giving me these looks like you're for real right now? you have zero feelings for her? and i mean i thought our interactions were normal and i guess i brushed off a lot of them that looked flirty or came off that way and samy did too so that's probably why it took us so long to catch on."

"even though you guys are long distance right now, how are you two working through that while taking on this new territory of your relationship?"

"well, it's definitely easier because we know one another so well. it helps that we didn't have an awkward stage because we kind of already went through that when we were kids. plus, samy just makes it easy. we're very alike so we know why we are the way we are. she's always been there for me and i've always been there for her. we're constantly supporting one another and we call everyday just like talking about our days or games if we have them. if we can't call, we send like 10 voice messages explains our days. it's just easy because we know each other so well, so nothing has to be misread or miscommunicated because we already know. it definitely sucks we're not together like we were for two years, but it just makes seeing one another that more special when it comes around."

"that's really special. your relationship has always been really special to the fans who've been following you two for while now, so i know they love seeing you guys finally together. i'm sure they knew way before you guys did too," will and the interviewer shared a laugh.

"i'm sure they did. samy and i aren't the best at picking up clues like that," will chuckled.

view all comments

user1 OH MY GOD I CANT??? THEYRE BOTH SO ADORABLE AWWW

user2 IGE BEEN WAITING FIR THIS ONE!!!! i knew i knew i knew they'd finally end up together

user3 the best friends to lovers pipeline is so incredibly real

user4 WILL'S FRIENDS KNOWING BEFORE HE DID!!! god they must've been so painfully obvious back then to everyone but themselves

user5 golden retriever and golden retriever fr

user6 stop i love these two sm they truly did grow up together and seeing them try out a relationship is so cute i hope they work out!!!

user7 MY roman empire

user8 oh they're in love love

user9 them calling everyday is so cute oh my god

user10 THEM HAVING THE SAME NUMBERS UNPLANNED IS LITERALLY FATE AND DESTINY

user11 samy hughes and will smith make so much sense in my head

user12 THE WAY HE CALLS HER SAMY IS SO CUTE

user13 we need them in an interview together next!!!

user14 samy saying how will looked at her for a little too long and she just knew is so fucking real on god like i get you girl so bad if will looked at me the way he looks at her i'd fold immediately

user15 i love that they're so willing to share this with us bc we basically grew up with them too

user16 i'm actually obsessed with them

user17 THEYVE BEEN SOFT LAUNCHING EACH OTHER THUS ENTIRE TIME??!

user18 im definitely betting it was some sort of like drunk confession at will's draft party because samy said she couldn't get into the details meaning she couldn't tell the interviewer they were underage drinking GOD i love them sm

[davidisnotmyname]

okay I do think that the adrenaline coursing through my veins while reading the comic for the first time has somewhat faded, and the rose colored glasses I was wearing have turned into normal colored glasses cuz my vision still sucks regardless. Anyways I wanted to actually share my opinions on the story of the comic and how it was handled. As you should be expecting by now, major spoilers for the seventh comic ahead:

First off, I want to make it clear that any criticisms I have are not meant to be a dig at the artists and writers. They could have easily left the project as dead, but they decided to give us all closure after seven years. The comic team is chock full of incredibly talented creatives, and I have only the utmost respect for the time and energy they put into this project. I am incredibly grateful for that. Additionally, I am not an expert on storytelling, nor do I claim to be. I’m just a neurodivergent kid who feels insanely strongly about this game and fandom, and I felt compelled to share my personal feelings. Anyways, yeah here’s what I think:

I am… a bit upset with how they managed the characters in this comic. Not in terms of mischaracterization, they did a fine job with that as per usual. However, it really feels like the mercs got totally sidelined in the comic about the game that they’re literally the main characters of. Most of them had barely any lines (if I am recalling things correctly, Medic did not speak once(obviously pyro doesn’t actually speak, but there wasn’t any mmph-mmphing to be seen anywhere either), Demoman and Sniper had like one line each, and even the mercs who did have more significant line counts felt largely overshadowed by other characters). In my personal opinion, the only merc who had significant contribution to the plot through his lines was Engineer and maybe Spy (soldier and heavy talk quite a bit, but it feels like soldier is only really talking for exposition and to connect to the time skip, and heavy is there to save his ass from the Korean mafia).

They were treated more as background characters than anything. A vast majority of the scenes involve the mercs just standing in the general vicinity of characters like Pauling and Admin as the actual plot happens. It’s disappointing since this was kind of a last hurrah for official lore and characterization regarding the mercs. This was already an issue in the previous comics (with characters like pyro being largely ignored and just hanging out in the background), but it’s increased tenfold here.

also, I cannot express my sadness enough about how we got basically no detailed interactions between the mercs other than spy and scout (duh) and heavy and soldier (double duh). Tf2 is such a unique circumstance in regards to its characters. They are exaggerated and cartoonish in their personalities, but they’re still fueled by their own motivations, fears, and emotions. They’re really fun to watch interact with their world and each other, and that opportunity kind of got chucked out of the window.

A prime example of this would be Medic and Heavy. And no, before you start saying “oh you’re just upset that they weren’t made canon,” I’m not talking about shipping necessarily (although it would have been really nice to have a canon queer couple, especially after so many years, plus their romantic dynamic is really enjoyable at least for me, but hey, it would be kinda out of left field if they were suddenly explicitly). Let’s take a look back at the previous comic, shall we?

in that comic, the very climax is centered around their relationship. Medic dies and goes to hell and Heavy beats the shit out of the Classic Heavy, quite literally stating he didn’t care if he died as long as Classic Heavy suffered. Keep in mind, they haven’t seen each other in months, and they’ve only reunited for like five seconds maybe before Medic is killed. Their bond is explicitly depicted and is used as a tool to move the plot forward. What do we get for the final comic?

uh… well, they certainly stand next to each other multiple times.

ALSO, even simple interactions between the mercs contributed so much to the story, even if it was just the humor of it or just small glimpses into their characters. The whole conversation between Medic and Demo about his eye, Sniper and Spy mildly beefing but ultimately sharing cigarettes while they’re both severely wounded, Heavy and Scout’s conversation on the motorbike. These brought so much life into the story, but in the seventh comic, they took like two dynamics (soldier with heavy and spy with scout) and just ran with it. I wish we could have seen the mercs actually do shit, to basically sum up my incoherent attempt of making a point or two.

[arcadekitten]

Hello, arcadekitten! I've recently been grabbed and dunked headfirst into your games and am currently hyperfixating on them(First hyperfixation that hasn't been my ocs in years lol!) and am currently on the grind of trying to figure out Reginald's weird plot! I've only got about a page of notes so far in my doc, more questions than answers but I thought it would be neat to share, so here are some things I've noticed! **Spoilers for My Wishmaker and Cemetary Mary for anyone reading lol** Reginald strangely isn't affected by bad injuries too much? Seen in My Wishmaker as he has his whole arm chopped off and can walk seemingly ok without a tourniquet or anything to stop the bleeding? Ik having your arm chopped off doesn't affect walking around but my goodness he's awfully chill in this situation. In Cemetary Mary in Twylas good ending when he is shot in the leg and eventually stands back up on both of his legs to walk over to Mary(But I guess this could be explained by him having adrenaline from the whole ordeal, or if you're my friend ''it's because he's crazy and has uber demon warlock time god powers'') Also at the end of the prologue, he is shot twice and(seemingly maybe) gets back up again after the purple text(Eye fellow most likely) I don't have an explanation for this, as I could very well be overanalyzing it and it could be cartoon/game logic or the characters having different anatomy but I think maybe it has something to do with our purple eye fellow, whether it just some strange effect/gift they have/gave or if Reginald is born with some crazy pain tolerance lol, or if he maybe he asked for it(After rereading this I am definitely over analyzing but we'll leave my crazy rant up LMAO) Reginald says the eye has an affinity for objects like the clock, which makes me believe that our purple-eye fellow was definitely in Cemetery Mary the same way he is in My Wishmaker. The scenes that come to mind immediately are Reginald's vanity(I think that's what it's called) and (less likely maybe) the coffin at the church funeral. Obviously whatever it is makes Mary feel not too great so I wonder why it's only her and (seemingly) not Reginald(Although again maybe it's that crazy pain tolerance lmao). Mary is definitely connected in some way to the eye but I don't know how yet other than maybe her just being around Reginald, he says he doesn't want her to ask about that silly stuff as she could end up in a similar position to him and it wouldn't work out for either of them. So I wonder what that means. Eye fellow says they thought Reginald was better at this(Killing people maybe? Reference to Cemetary Mary?)(The eye looked forward too when he responds with ‘’Oh yknow..’’ which like..fourth wall break?) Idk just smth I thought was neat There is so much more stuff I can talk about and I will probably go back and scream because I've put more points together or I forgot to mention smth but this is all I'll put since I've already written a lot and I don't want this to be too long aa so ill end my midnight ramble here But anyway I really enjoy your games and I can't wait to see more from you in the future!! (Tho one last question does the eye have pronouns I feel as if I'm misgendering the purple eyeball lmao)

So many observations and notes, I am so fllattered! I miss I could say more but I don't want to spoil anything! You'll just have to wait and see for more answers! ♡

As for the eyeball character, they go by any pronouns but will most consistently be referred to as "they" and "it" !

[tide-locked]

ok! so i know that you're not to try to motivate yourself with punishment, however: i cannot argue with the results. also, @failonade asked, and who am i to deny the people in my phone the right to make fun of me?

most of this is under a cut because i cannot imagine it will be interesting to most people, but two or three of you will think it's hilarious.

why am i using a silly wip game to organise my stuff? well. because i am, generally, not much of a writer. when i'm working on things—like, for work, etc—they always end up with a standardised name, and i take notes as needed in either a notebook or a text file entitled 'work', as the vibes suit. this is not especially descriptive, but ctl-f for keywords gets me where i need to be, and it's fine!

unfortunately. this meant that when, for the first time in nearly a decade, i considered writing something, i thought to myself, 'it's fine! just stick it in a file called fic!'

it's worth taking a moment here to tell you that one of the things i enjoy about notepad++ is that it autosaves your tabs. they're not saved saved, but when you open the program again, they're in the same state. unless something went catastrophically wrong at some point. but usually they're in the same state! i mention this only because i have a bad habit, especially with work-related things, of simply closing notepad++ and telling myself that it will preserve things for me, something that works well 99% of the time and completely loses all the information that i'd made note of the remaining 1% of the time.

and so, for a minute, i did fic notes more or less the same way i take notes for work-related things: just an unsaved text file with no real headers or organisation, and nothing to mark the transitions between projects, because i can obviously tell that by keyword.

you may, at this point, have spotted the error that i did not: if one is writing several fics about the same show, there are not, in fact, easy keywords in the text that will tell you which bits were intended with which fic.

so i again, cleverly, thought, well, the solution to this is to use more text files, obviously. simply make one for every project.

an interesting thing about living in the future is the way that everything's so connected. people move seamlessly between locations and devices and you never even notice it happening, because everything is so connected. is my friend on the train while we're talking? on her sofa? at work? quite possibly all three, and on my end, this is entirely unnoticeable.

however, i am, it turns out, also a people! but do you know what is not connected? that's right. text files, especially if you are the sort of person who simply does not believe in saving text files, and believes in your heart that if the contents disappear, it's a sign that you should just let it go.

at this point, some people might stop and think, 'are all these text files really necessary? maybe there's a better way!'

that's quitter talk, tho. what i thought was 'yeah, i mean, i'll just add bits in my notes app or in my private discord server and then paste them into the text files later!'

which is a thing you can do. but at some point you find out that discord only likes to scroll back so far, and also that your notes app has a character limit, after which it tells you to get the fuck into the docs.

which you do, because what other choice is there?

a skilled observer, someone who's good at math and counting, may at this point notice that there are now four locations involved in this process. a skilled observer, or simply someone who is smarter than i am, which is a very low bar, might think, wow, that's kind of a lot of locations you've got there, buddy! sure would be a shame if things got all nonsensically jumbled together!

i, on the other hand. i found out about ellipsus, and i thought, oh, i'm just going to try this, i'll just throw a couple things in there and see how it goes. and so i did.

here is what i did not do: stop writing in the text files. or in the notes app. or in discord. i also did not transfer everything from the text files to ellipsus, or anywhere else. i also did not transfer everything from gdocs to…anywhere.

unfortunately, at some point in the past week, i've realised that at this point, i have a truly horrifying number of versions of some files. they're not labelled or even saved, in many instances. i keep finding things that i thought i'd fully deleted, or things that i have three versions of, and they're all within a couple hundred words of each other, but the most recent scenes have nothing at all in common.

which is to say that currently, my notepad++ tab bar looks like this.

if there's a .txt in the name, it means that it was, at some point, saved. when? well. that's not my business. i am now down to twenty-two open files. some of them have literally tens of thousands of words; some of them have work-style notes about medical appointments and bills and random phone numbers; some of them have notes about fics my friends are writing; some of them have as many as two or three sentences with absolutely no further context.

one of them contains, in total, the words 'not actually dead'. that's it, that's the file. 'not actually dead'. the period is outside the quotes because it is not in the fucking file. what did i mean by that. why did i feel that it needed its own file. what the fuck does this mean. we may never know! there's certainly not gonna be any insight from this corner!

another uninteresting fact about me is that i am, in many regards, sort of a minimalist. there are three open tabs on my phone. i have never accessed ao3 except in an incognito window. my search history is empty. i feel like having a dozen tabs open is a lot of tabs. (not you, text files, you're perfect.)

however, right now, i have seven tabs open (normal! fine!), and then…i have. this.

i am sitting here, three in the morning, waiting for a storm to (please please please) roll through, picking at a fic that i'm writing and also sieving through all these goddamned files (yes, the ones in notes and gdocs, too) and consolidating.

questions you may have, at this point, because they're certainly questions that i have:

is this productive? i don't know.

will this fix me? almost certainly not.

is this a good use of my time? i honestly could not tell you; never before have i been in this position, and i don't quite know what to do with it.

will this make it slightly less likely that i have to spend between three minutes and three hours skimming files and looking for the one thing that i want to work on? possibly. hopefully. perhaps. god i hope so.